Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Simplifying the Sticky Issues

Having a healthy relationship is important, but no one said that it would be easy. Especially when you're married and trying to establish a household, it seems like a constant state of crisis will be present in your life. This doesn't necessarily mean a problem with the relationship itself. Far more commonly, in fact, it's some sticky issue that is difficult to maneuver as a couple. The trick here is almost always to simplify the issue to reduce conflict.

Debt and finances are not just a major issue in relationships; they are THE major issue. This subject is often cited as the number one reason for relationship arguments. The best solution in the world is just to get out of debt and be financially secure. When this isn't possible, handing the task off to someone else can be a viable solution. Debt consolidation services can help remove the strain of figuring out bill payments, and it can help you get out of debt more quickly.

For financial issues, anything left in your court should be handle by using CCC - or "crystal clear communication." This is the best solution for money issues, but it's also the first important step in almost anything you do. Make sure that both partners in the relationship know which tasks fall to them, and that everyone feels the situation is fair.

Similarly, in like disciplining a child, taking the time to communicate about appropriate consequences, who is to enact them and what to do in exceptional circumstances is important. Then it's simply a matter of applying the rules consistently in order to make life simpler for you and your children. After all, children are in desperate need of stability and clarity. Applying understandable and consistent rules will provide this for them, and make it more likely that they will respect you as an authority figure.