Friday, September 19, 2008

How are you?

As you can see, my blog is saturated with memes and tags these days. I haven’t posted any updates about me or my baby for quite some time. And my last post was last Monday. How am I? I was just busy and pre-occupied physically, emotionally and mentally.

…busy with EC dropping. I got addicted to it because of the EC toolbar which helped me drop my card a lot easier. And since I got two blogs, I need to drop 600 cards per day. So when I’m about to start a post, my hands are already tired {dropping cards}.

…busy PLURKING {another addiction}. Since all my mommy blogger friends are there, I can’t help but share with their discussions. Of course, I am having so much fun chatting with them not to mention that plurking helps with regards to getting news and other updates on our blogging “rakets”.

The more serious matters…

…I'm torn between quitting my job to join hubby in Riyadh {he recommended me to a company and they already processing my papers, though I’m really not sure if I’d go} and staying here since I have a lot of things to do here. Actually I’ve got good reasons to stay here though I really want to resign from work since last year. The main thing is, we’re still processing our housing loan and our house will be constructed by end of this year, if I’ll go what will happen, right? And two, I’m not sure if the company will allow me to bring my daughter. I don’t want to leave her. Period.

…I was emotionally down. I was not “performing” well with regards to my church ministry. I don’t know why but it seems that we are being graded {like the scholars of PDA, hehehe!} whenever we sing in front of the congregation, especially worship leaders like me. I know I am not a good singer. I guess my voice and “performance” in leading are not “good enough” for them so they let me “rest” for a while. I was not given a schedule for next month. The good side is, I can rest. I’ve been singing every Sunday for two consecutive months so I felt drained and tired. The down side, after learning about the schedule it brought negative impact on me. Honestly, I am really disappointed. Have you been in a situation where you accepted and agreed with enthusiasm to sing or do something for a special event only to spin into depression afterward because you felt you were not so great? That’s what I felt that time. I know you don’t understand what I’m talking about here. But the good thing is, I was able to buy a book by Darlene Zschech, “Extravagant Worship” last week. Been reading it since the day I bought it and it helped ease my disappointments. I guess I feel much better now.

So that’s it. If you’ll asked how I am doing, I’m okay :D. I hope though that I can post more personal updates here aside from tags and memes. Happy weekend everyone!


2 comments:

kbguy said...

wow, u seems bz.. and how did u juggle around alone with your baby and work and so much activities ?
Btw, I found ur blogs while dropping my EC. Also, rgds to hubby..
haha. Will be dropping by again to read ur blog. Hopefully u'll get to join ur hubby in ridhaah soon.

momie milette said...

parang namiss ko magcomment sa blog mo. haha. puro kasi tayo plurk eh.

wow, mhay tough decision yang pagpunta mo sa riyadh baka sakali. mahirap.

and regarding dun sa church ministry mo wag ka masyado madisappoint. i feel that god is telling you something kaya nangyari yun. no need to be sad.