Monday, August 28, 2006

Captured Moments


Yawning Jaden..."girl na po ako mommy..."(ear pierced:8.25.2006)


Ready to rumble?

Happy

Friday, August 25, 2006

My Birthing Kwento

This is it..my long-overdue birthing story....

May 27, 2006 (Saturday)
My weekly check up. Ok naman daw kami ni baby...Sabi ni doc 3cm na ko so now is the time para magpatagtag. She adviced me to walk more often. She also told me na magpa biophysical score on Monday para malaman namin ang position ni baby. Natuwa naman ako kasi last day of work ko yesterday so I have plenty of time pa para magpatagtag.

May 28, 2006 (Sunday)
I'm a bit anxious na manganak na talaga but still no signs of labor yet...I went to church as usual. I just prepared for my BPS tomorrow.

May 29, 2006 (Monday)
Woke up early for my BPS. Super heavy na ang pakiramdam ko sa tiyan ko. Feeling ko malapit na talaga lumabas si baby. I'm also keen on monitoring her movements. Gumagalaw naman siya lagi para nga akong may octopus sa loob ng tiyan even on our way to the clinic.

Pagdating sa clinic, sabi ng nurse balik daw ako ng 10:30 kasi wala pa yung mag-uultrasound. So uwi ulit kami ng ate sa bahay. Kumain ng konte, by 10:00 balik kami sa clinic. Tamang-tama naman andun na yung sonologist. Tinawag na yung name ko so pasok na ko sa loob ng room. She started checking baby... No movement... check niya yung parts ng body ni baby, ok naman. She checked the heartbeat, meron naman. Then check niya ulit yung movement, wala pa rin. She asked me to lie on my left side for ten minutes tapos sabihin ko daw kung may movement na. Sunod naman ako. Meron naman. Nararamdaman ko na gumagalaw baby ko.

"Doc, gumagalaw naman po siya."
"Madalas ba? Pakiramdaman mo uli. Hindi kasi siya gumagalaw sa monitor eh. Yun yung gusto malaman ng OB mo kaya ka niya pina BPS."

Ok fine...naisip ko lang. So after 10 minutes, chinek niya uli. Wala pa rin daw movement. Hindi naman na uli gumalaw si baby...bakit kaya? Kampante pa rin ako. Alam ko kasi gumagalaw baby ko.

"Ok. Sige pwede na to". She told me to wait outside for the result. After siguro mga 10 minutes, tinawag uli name ko. Pagbigay ng result binasa ko naman.
Sabi ng result:

Fetal Tone : 0
Fetal Movement : 0
Fetal Heartbeat : 2
AFI (Amniotic Fluid): 2
Bio Physical Score : 4/8

Hindi ko naman pinaniwalan yung result kasi pagdating namin sa bahay, gumalaw naman ulit si baby. Pero I texted pa rin the result to my OB. Mga 11am na yun. She didn't reply. I thought ok lang lahat.

3:30 pm. Dumating si Jerry from work. Nagyaya mag-mall. Go naman ako. Sa isip ko, maganda nga magmall muna ako ng makapag lakad-lakad. Kasama namin ate ko and her 2 year-old daughter. We went to Sta. Lucia East. Lakad lakad kami. Enjoy na enjoy naman si Jerry. He acted na parang daddy ni Alyssa. Then we went to World's of Fun para makapag rides ang niece ko. I just stayed naman sa bench kasi pagod na talaga ako. Namamaga na ang binti ko kakalakad :D. Sabi ko after nila mag play kumain na kami kasi gutom na ko. Mga 7pm, I received a call from my OB. She said that time lang niya nabasa ang text message ko dahil nagtake daw siya ng antihistamine dahil sobrang sakit ng ulo niya at nakatulog siya. Sabi niya, hindi raw maganda ang result ng BPS ko. Hindi daw ako pwede i-induce kasi the baby needs to be remove asap...as in kailangan i-CS ako. Hindi na daw ako pwede abutan ng bukas. She advised me to go to the hospital immediately. I was shocked. I prepared my self naman for a normal or a caesarian delivery. But I did set my mind na normal lang ako. After the call, shock pa rin ako. I told Jerry everything. Hindi din siya makapaniwala. Ate ko naman advised us to consult another OB for a second opinion. Hindi pa kami nito kumakain ha, at hindi na talaga kami kumain pa. I texted my sister who works at St. John The Baptist hospital (malapit lang ito sa mall) na pupunta kami para maghingi ng second opinion sa OB nila dun. Pagdating namin dun, hindi pala niya naintindihan ang message ko. Nakaalis na ang OB... We went to another OB na malapit sa bahay. I told him (lalaki po kasi siya...kaya kahit malapit siya sa bahay namin hindi siya ang naging OB ko :D) everything. He checked the baby's heartbeat, Ok naman daw. Pero based on the result if he's my OB he will do the same daw. He's just not sure kung accurate yung BPS ko. But we can't outwit it since wala ng bukas na clinic para magpa-second ultrasound. It's past 8 na kasi. Super late naman daw nagreply ang OB ko. Kung mas maaga sana nagawan pa ng paraan para ma-proved kung distress na nga ba si baby o hindi. Wala akong magawa that time kasi super confused na ko on what to do. I was really crying. I thought, sinadya ba ng OB na late magreply para I won't have a choice kundi mag pa-CS?

We went home. Nakapre-pare naman na ang mga gamit namin so naligo lang ako. Habang naliligo umiiyak pa rin ako at matagal ko tiningnan sa mirror ang sarili ko. I thought "This will be the last time na makikita kong clean ang belly ko. After today, May scar na siya...huhuhu..." :(

Nagprepare na rin si Jerry. Sa bahay naman ng mother ko, nagprepare na rin sila. Before kami umalis ng bahay, nag-pray muna kami. We just entrusted everything to God. After praying, I thought ...haay...this is it na talaga. Kailangan lakasan ko ang loob ko. We went then to my parent's house muna kasi andun ang mga sister ko na sasama samin sa hospital. Umiiyak pa rin ako. Ewan ko ba. Hindi ko lang siguro matanggap na CS ako :D. Ate ko naman kept on encouraging me and saying na ngayon dapat ko isipin hindi lang ang sarili ko kundi ang kalagayan ng baby ko. Don't compromise. Mga past 11 we went to the hospital na. On our way, mixed emotions pa rin ako. Excited na makikita ko na baby ko but sad na I will went under the knife. Pagbaba ng car sabi ko I wll pee muna...dahil sa nerbiyos siguro. Sabi ng sister ko meron naman daw CR sa ER dun n lng daw ako mag wee-wee.

Pagdating sa ER, eto na. Inaabangan na pala ako ng mga nurse doon.

"OrdoƱa po ba? Yung kay Dra. Tan? Cge po higa na lang po kayo dun (sa stretcher). Sunod na man ako. Kinuhaan ng BP, tinusukan ng dextrose, nilagyan ng oxygen. I thought, ano ba, wiwi-wee muna ko no... "Ay sige po, dun po ang CR"..kasi naman dirediretso hindi man lang nagtatanong kung ok na ko..hmp!"

Dumating naman na OB ko. Nagsorry siya dahil nga late ang response niya. After niya, dumating naman ang pedia ni baby. Ayun, dire-diretso na ko sa OR. On my way there, Jerry kept on saying..."Lakasan mo loob mo...kaya mo yan..."

Pagdating sa OR, andun na ang mga nurse assistants. Preni pare na nila ko for the operation. Nung ready na ko, they called in the anesthesiologist. Haay... grabe pala ang feeling ng may ige-general anesthesia.

"Ok...Mhay wag gagalaw ha. Invasive ito. Masakit pero tiisin mo lang... after nito wala ka ng mararamdaman." Nag chi-chill na yata ang buong katawan ko that time kaya nakagalaw ako ng konte. Hirap kaya ng position ko. Ang laki ng tyan ko tapos pina-curve ako ng sobra.

"Ok. Iangat mo nga ang right leg mo...hindi na ba maigalaw? Yung left leg naman...naangat pa? Ok. Sige isa pang tusok."
"Hindi natin kasi pwedeng biglain kaya unti-unti lang muna, maya-maya mararamdaman mo na ang effect niyan."
True enough, ilang sandili lang numb na half ng body ko. Gising pa rin ako ng mga sandaling iyon. May monitor na nakakabit sakin for my blood pressure. Ilang minutes pa, mga 12:30 pumasok na ang OB ko. Ang anesthesiologist naman stayed on my side para daw hindi ako makatulog muna. Kinakausap niya ko at sinasabi niya in detail yung mga nangyayari...

"Ayan May, kina-cut ka na..."
"O diba wala kang naramdaman? Malapit mo na makita baby mo..."
"Ayan nilalabas na siya..."
This time, I can feel nga na may hinuhugot sa loob nga tiyan ko pero walang pain.

"Ayan, nakuha na siya!".. then I heard my baby's cry. Ang lakas niya umiyak. Pagkarinig ko sa kanya I can't explain pero sobrang happiness ang naramdaman ko. Dinala nila sa side ko si Jaden para makita ko. Wala akong naisip kundi..."Ito na siya! Anak ko to..."

Her arrival..May 30, 2006 12:56 am


After mailabas ang placenta, kinlose na ang sugat ko then tinusukan na ko ng pampatulog, pero hindi ako nakatulog. Ewan ko ba. Naririnig ko pa rin ang iyak ni Jaden. Sa labas pala ng OR andun si Jerry at kinukunan na ng picture. :D. Nang matapos ang lahat, they wheeled me na sa recovery room. Hindi ko na alam kung ilang oras ako sa RR pero hindi talaga ako tulog na tulog. I'm aware na may nurse na nag mo-monitor sakin. By 3:30 am, dinala na ko sa room ko where Jerry and my sisters are waiting. Jerry asked me agad kung ok na ko. He said nasa nursery room na si baby. At ang ganda daw ng baby namin. Pagkatapos nun, nakatulog na ko ng dire-diretso.

Closing my belly..:D

May 30, 2006
7:00 am, nagising ako. Dumating na parents ko and my sisters. By this time, nag subside na effect ng anesthesia kaya masakit na pakiramdam ko. Hindi pa ko makatayo kaya sisters ko pinapapunta ko sa nursery room to check on baby at picturan din :D. Hindi pa rin ako pwede magsalita. Kaya pag nakikkipag usap ako sulat lagi sa papel. I'm excited to see Jaden pero hindi ko pa kaya kaya tiis tiis muna ko.



May 31, 2006
Hindi pa rin maganda ang pakiramdam ko. There's pain at kakatanggal lang ng catheter sakin kaya hirap pa ko mag-pee. Pero at least nakakapag lakad na ko. Maya-maya pumasok ang nurse at nanghingi ng damit ni baby. I asked kung pwede ko na siya i-room in.. kami daw bahala. Naisip ko din kasi doble charges ng room namin, kaya I decided na mag room-in na siya sakin. Sabik na rin ako makita siya. Maya pa dinala na siya sa room. Pagkakita ko sa kaniya parang lahat ng pain ng panganganak nakalimutan ko na.



now a family

We stayed until June 1 sa hospital. Pagkabayad namin nagprepare na kaming umuwi. (We spent 33K++ less the Philhealth. Mura na siya for a CS compared sa ibang hospitals ha.) Pagdating namin sa bahay may konting salu-salo for the new member of the family.

Friday, August 18, 2006

Curious

I did this LO to capture that moment I found Jaden really curious about her mittens... :)


Sunday, August 13, 2006

SMILE!




journaling:
Dear Little one, we never dreamed you’d be so beautiful in all of the times we tried to imagine every last detail of who you would be through all of the nights we spent quietly thinking of how we would feel when we first looked at you, we patiently waited and silently wondered, we hoped and we prayed and we tried to imagine…but we never dreamed you’d be so beautiful…love mommy and daddy

Monday, August 07, 2006

We're back!

I can't believe how quickly two months have flown! It's time to accept the reality that I need to get back to work. It's hard. Especially when I already got used to Jaden being attached to me, being with her the whole day...and now, leaving her for a couple of hours saddens me. But that's a fact I had to accept. I need to get use to our new set up. For the meantime, mother is taking care of her and I will just fetch her after work.

The first few weeks of her life had been a challenge to us...to our faith, finances and our being new parents. (see previous post). But thank God, we get by. God never failed to show us that He's always there and always approachable. I'm very much happy to announce that her CT Scan result was NORMAL with no significant findings...which means we have to worry no more. She's back to her normal activity and no more antibiotics to take... Thank God.

I'm also glad that I'm back to my pre-pregnancy weight and shape... that Fast! Well, I guess I owed that to my round the clock taking care of my baby with just a couple of minutes to take a nap. They say that breastfeeding will help us go back to our prepregnancy shape...unfortunately, I'm one of those who are not blessed with free flowing milk... :D, I breasfed her for just two weeks. But still, I'm amazed that I'm back in my old self again. I just missed though the time I was breastfeeding her... it was realy a wonderful experience. As a new mother, taking care of her was exhausting, exhilarating, scary, and wonderful all at the same time. And I enjoyed it. Having her really changed my life...our lives.

Jaden is at a really fun, interactive stage right now - gurgling, smiling and kicking her legs when she's happy. I talk to her often and she responds with her cute "coos". She looks at me and smiles as she sees the movement of my lips. As per Jerry, I think he's enjoying his being a father to her. I remember the first time he changed her wet nappy, I was really laughing since he didn't know how to do it.. But now he's learning. He's an excited dad.

Speaking of Jerry, we are doing pretty well as a couple. And now, having Jaden seemed to make our bond stronger. We just celebrated our first wedding anniversary last July 23. It's not an extravagant celebration since we were still at the stage of trial because of our daughter. We just enjoyed our free anniversary cake from Alex Franco (it was really yummy!) and had a romantic dinner in the ambiance and comfort of our home (where else?). Jerry gave me a dozen pink roses. It was sweet. I didn't expect a more expensive gift... The good health God gave to our daughter and the normal results of all her tests was the best gift we've ever received this year.

Lastly, I want to thank all those ladies who visited my blog and prayed for our daughter..It helps to know that there are people who are very much concern and always willing to help through prayers. Thank you very much!

My blog is now up and running again..I will be posting my baby's development from time to time..when I have the time of course :D

First Time DAD

Baby's CT Scan

Our cutie.... active and healthy


my 12 pink roses


Our free anniv cake from Alex Franco....after feasting on it! :D

9 weeks

Jaden at 9 weeks